A Community I Didn’t Know Existed

Please Note: Group attendees’ experiences are shared in this blog; however, their names have been changed to respect confidentiality.

The sun will return – you don’t have to journey alone.

What if there was a place you could go? A place where no one would judge you.

Where you could be authentically – you.

Where your struggles became your strengths.

Where you felt wanted – even needed.

Would you go?

It was years ago, but I can still see her in my mind’s eye. Timidly, she began to grasp the weathered door handle of a century-old building. The old wooden door, chipped and swollen from changing temps needed a push to even allow entry. She accomplished the task. Stepped over the uneven, aged concrete step, and entered an unknown space, with unknown faces. Her body physically trembling, with the same level of fear one might have if a large, wild animal was lurking behind. She was in a safe place, but her mind wasn’t sure. Rushing thoughts circled her brain dancing with doubt. Fear pounded in her chest. Her throat tightened into a large sailor’s knot. The exit was close and seemed safer. Easier, I’m sure. But I could tell by the way she looked at me, starting this process all over again was not an option – not this time.

Fear can be paralyzing. It can take us into dark spaces. It can cause us to distort ideas and thoughts. It can try to rationalize what isn’t rational. It can also be calmed. Released. Set free. Supported. 

The ARC began offering anxiety support groups 19 years ago.

The ARC began offering support groups 19 years ago. First in-person, then four years ago online –  to provide support during the pandemic. Since then, we have offered a mix of in-person and virtual groups. We have held over 1,000 anxiety support groups. The most common theme rising out of those groups is “I realized I wasn’t alone.” 

It’s not always easy to feel understood when you have anxiety. Some have shared they can be surrounded by family and friends and know they are loved, but still, feel alone. In a support group setting, the feeling of being alone is lessened. It’s a place to discover other people who have the same thoughts and feelings. A place without judgment.

“I look forward to the groups because a lot of times I’m lonely. I want to be around people, but it has to be the right people – this you will find at the ARC! Warm, genuinely caring peers who will listen and want to help,” said Lee.

“I realized I wasn’t alone” is the common theme we hear from ARC support group attendees.

Some feel the advantage of a group is that others can relate. Family and friends may genuinely want to help, but sometimes they don’t know what to do. They try to “fix” it or offer solutions. Others in the group “get it” and can just listen.

“My psychiatrist recently said he feels my involvement with the ARC is so critical to staying mentally fit. He agrees therapy is important, but for me at this point, he feels wellness activities like attending the ARC support groups, monthly Zoom topic nights, and presentations give me the socialization aspect, which is the missing piece in my mental health journey; especially if I’m spiraling downward. You need support from others when you are struggling,” Betsy shared.

ARC groups offer a confidential and safe space to share. No one is required to speak. Sometimes just showing up and being on the call is enough. It can help us have the perspective that we aren’t the only ones worrying or obsessing. 

“The ARC is an inviting, welcoming place to be whether it be on Zoom or in-person. The Director selects the best of the best in facilitators. All are knowledgeable and compassionate, I never feel ‘put on the spot.’ I never feel pressured to speak. Active listening is encouraged. What you say at the ARC, stays at the ARC. Confidentiality is treated with utmost respect,” Lyndia commented.

“There’s something truly profound about people with similar struggles talking openly. You feel less alone.”

“It is always a little hard at first to open up in the groups because you do not know who is there or their issues, but in the almost two plus years I have been attending they’ve all been very informative and enjoyable,” Rachel added.

Tom offered this advice, “Give it a try. Go several times before you make a decision. You gotta put yourself out of your comfort zone, and there [group] you can experience some of the greatest support. There’s something truly profound about people with similar struggles talking openly. You feel less alone. You learn from each other. It’s different from therapy. Community is what you’ll find here.”

That was true for the woman who struggled to walk through the door so many years ago. I was able to observe how an hour in the group helped her. Her trembling body appeared to change. While she was quiet and reserved, she was no longer shaking. She appeared calmer and more relaxed. When we can find others who have the same thoughts and feelings, we realize we aren’t alone. There’s strength in walking through hard times together.

The ARC offers multiple groups, open to anyone over the age of 18. Visit Support Groups to find a group for you and don’t miss our upcoming event Rising Above Anxiety. On Sept 11, Mike Maddox will share his inspirational story of living with an anxiety disorder. Learn how he went from a struggling teen to living a full, vibrant, and joyful life.